awkwardgirl: (SHUTTHEFUCKUP)
( Dec. 2nd, 2008 07:04 pm)
So, the ovaries that I have? The ones that the ultrasound tech said were "perfectly normal," assuring me that my problems "weren't ovarian at all"? The ovaries that could in no way explain for my symptoms, according to my doc and one of her colleagues? Oh, you mean the right ovary that is almost twice the size of the other one (we're talking, the left one is around 5.1 cm. The right? Over 9 cm.) Yanno the one, it has all the cysts in it. THAT ovary. Riiiight.

They still have no clue what's wrong with me, but either way, it ends in surgery. I will find out at the end of this week about a procedure that I have to have done (filled with cathaters and sedation and checking blood for excess DHEA, and a day trip to the hospital! FUN!) and then the results of THAT will tell me if they remove my left adrenal gland, or half/all of my right ovary. There's more bitching, but after talking about it to my mom, the surgeon, the surgeon's assistant, his OTHER assistant, the girl at the radiology place, my mom again, and then my ohana, [livejournal.com profile] aoibhe and [livejournal.com profile] secretchristine (also known as Thing One and Thing Two) over the phone, I actually think I'm all bitched out.

So regardless of which internal organ gets ganked from my guts, I have PCOS, and will continue to have that for the rest of my life. It's not a horrible thing to have in the long run, I suppose, it's better than something like diabetes and insulin shots, but it's not even a little bit fun. At least I am Not Crazy in thinking that something has been wrong for YEARS with me, and the fact that I have pain all the time in my ovaries (like right now *sigh*) isn't just me projecting some strange brand of hypochondria on 'em.

In all honesty, knowing that there's an answer that I can see on the horizon makes me feel better. Although not by much. Still. I think I deserve to have a helluva birthday this year though, with all the crap I've been put through. (Okay, so that is also probably not gonna happen, but a girl can dream.) Depressed. BLAH!! BLAAAAAAH, I say. Am trying to keep laughing -- otherwise I will cry and that WILL NOT DO. I need ice cream. And movies. Barring that, a stiff drink and a half nekked Jensen Ackles serving it to me, pls & thx. =P

Today's Horoscope for Capricorn: You may feel on-edge today because you are being drawn into something new and you would prefer to hold on to the status quo. But living in the past isn't helpful when the future is approaching so fast. Accepting the fact that your life will change in very profound ways can be the first step to reclaiming your security and confidence.

...yeah, no kidding. =p

ps: The girl got my Greggia Pullip today. SO RELIEVED! And she left me a really nice message on my Dolly Market Feedback thread, so that made me smile. One less thing to worry over, yay!
Yanno, when we get a bite block to make at NOON that has to go out THIS VERY SAME DAY, no wonder we don't get to take lunch until nearly 2pm. *flop* Ah well, that meant I only had about an hour left of work to do when we got back from break, and that was pretty awesome. SO TIRED THOUGH. I spent far too much time running to catch my phone ringing and playing phone-tag with doctors. I've called about five times to no less than three different doctors today. When I have the energy, I will write up the sorry tale of woe that is my health recently. I am not on speaking terms with my ovaries, and my adrenal glands? Fuggitaboutit. They can just fuck right off. =P Am so beyond sick of this...erm...being sick...ness. Yeah. That.

Despite being very much annoyed with my mother yesterday, she hath redeemed herself! She juiced THIRTY key limes to make "a key lime pie for Thanksgiving for her rotten daughter," as I requested last night. WOOT! YAY MOMMY!

I can has Re-ment? I opened ten boxes of Merry Strawberry today, with help from mom, for my very much spoiled Dal, Linden. Basically, I love things that are tiny. This, I cannot help. I'm gonna go take pictures now.

ps: PEOPLE! Watch Pushing Daisies tonight! <3

Christmas Came Early...
.

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